SEVEN??? 
Well, I do hope this time you invested in a better brand of super-glue to attach them and trimmed them to a more believable length? Having a smattering of 18 inch hairs springing forth from you neckline only to land in your soup is rather off-putting, even if your Grindr 'date' was open-minded...
Yes, I still exist! Or at least someone with access to my account and my sharp repartee does...
Admittedly I've slowed down, hence why your birthday on the 28th doesn't earn a response until the first of July now. I suppose it must be much like people sending their regrets to invitations you send well after the date of the event, so something you are familiar with I'm sure.
It's truly wonderful to hear from you again Mr. Ears! Do they allow you access to a computer often at the Home, or is it just a yearly special occasion on your birthday?
Well, now I'm left to ponder which three accusations you deny, which ones you admit to, and what the Police records actually say...
But first! I'm off to find those four posts on this forum you claim have popped up since last year...
